First and foremost wishing everybody a very Happy Paddy’s Day… and following weekend for those lucky enough to take Friday off.
We are hoping this weekend we cross the 500 Page Like mark in our Facebook! We know however we cannot be asking you for a LIKE without giving something in return so we have compiled a collection of cheesy one liners that will make you the star of your Paddy’s Day gathering. Feast your senses…
What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a four-leaf clover?
A rash of good luck.
What do you get when you do the Irish jig at McDonalds?
A Shamrock Shake
Why can’t you borrow money from a leprechaun?
Because they’re always a little short.
Why don’t you iron 4-Leaf clovers?
Because you don’t want to press your luck.
I went out drinking on St Patricks Day, so I took a bus home…
That may not be a big deal to you, but I’ve never driven a bus before.
Q: How is a best friend like a 4-leaf clover?
A: Because they are hard to find and lucky to have.
Q: What do ghosts drink on St Patricks Day?
A: BOOs
Q: Why wasn’t Jesus born in Ireland?
A: He couldn’t find 3 wise men or a virgin.
Q: How can you tell if an Irishman is having a good time?
A: He’s Dublin over with laughter!
Q: What do you get when you cross a pillowcase with a stone?
A: A sham rock
Q: Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick’s Day?
A: Regular rocks are too heavy.
Q: How does every Irish joke start?
A: By looking over your shoulder.
Q: What has eight arms and an IQ of 60?
A: Four girlfriends (blond?) drinking on St Patricks Day!
Q: How did the Irish Jig get started?
A: Too much to drink and not enough restrooms!
Q: Why did God invent Jameson whiskey?
A: So the Irish would never rule the world.
Q: What do you call an Irishman who knows how to control his wife?
A: A bachelor.
Q: What’s the main difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?
A: 1 less drunk at the party
Q: What do you call a diseased Irish criminal?
A: A leper con
Taken from: http://jokes4us.com/holidayjokes/stpatricksdayjokes/stpatricksdayonelinersjokes.html
You can find many more at http://www.st-patricks-day.com/irish_jokes
Oh and by the way, we could do with a LIKE in Facebook if you think we deserve it!!